I wanna grow old with you

My my, how time flies.. Its been exactly one year and I am still madly in love with you. There is no one else in this world that makes me feel the way you do. No one else.. I want to build a relationship with you, as strong as an oak tree that will weather through any storm and I believe we can.. I wanna to grow old with you..

My last relationship was sweet. He is all a girl wants. He's nice, sweet, sensitive, merchured, puts your needs before his, always thinking about the best for you, polite, never shouts, never hurts your feelings and most importantly was that he loved me a lot. We could always get along fine, seldom quarrelled. Despite all these qualities, I still felt something missing in the relationship.. but I could not pin point what. I held on because I had thought myself, that I was just being silly and besides what more can a girl ask for? He is everything that a girl would look for in a guy. So I just ignored what I felt. Its just a phase I told myself. And so our relationship lasted for 4 years. Long eh.. I admit that I did not put in as much effort as he did. And I knew that if someone better was to come along, I would break-up. But I still held on because I was afraid that I would not find somebody better. I was afraid that it would be a mistake. My thinking was about making that one person perfect and not finding that perfect person. I loved him definitely but he was someone I could live with but can live without. I had been selfish and unfair..

Finally, I had the guts to face my feelings. I realised that a person should be happy being in love. So happy that you want to tell the whole world that you are blissfully in love. To be able to turn around in circles till you get dizzy and fall on the ground still not believing that you are in love. You should want to give it your all in a relationship and not half-heartedly. I felt really guilty and sad when we broke-up. Guilty because I had to break his heart twice for me to realise and sad because I did love him. He deserves someone better than me.. someone that would love him just as much and it was something I was not capable of doing. I thought myself that I would never ever find someone that would love me so much.. and I deserved to be a spinster for hurting such a sweet guy. But I couldn't be untrue to myself.. I just couldn't..

When you close the door behind you, then only another would open..

I started dating "Mister Kuci" exactly a year ago.. and this guy.. geez.. where do I even begin. He full of shit, does crazy things, full fo sarcasm, full of evil plots and mischievous things up his sleeve but full of surprises too, has great taste of moosic, plays the guitar, so vain but smells great and yada yada yada. To tell ya the truth, I still don't know this guy very well although we have been friends like forever.. All I do know is that I have never ever been so sure about someone before and I can finally say I have found someone I wanna grow old with and I am happy =)